philosophic inquiry into life and meaning

...if truth were not for man the desire for truth would not be as a burning unrest in his heart...

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If I take on a reading or thought of one who seems to know something about Reality, then I can take it on temporary consideration and test it out. Yes, but assuming this reading or thought is true, suspending disbelief, how then does it apply or affect me and what I know to be real and true and how does it affect my life now?


What am I reading and how does it pertain to truth and reality as it is or as I know it?


Seek Ye First the Kingdom of God



What is my question my motivation behind the reading? What hits home?


Surrender to what is rather than what I would wish or like to be. Reality is what it is and as it appears to me now. My reaction is secondary to what I take to be reality.  I am reacting to my beliefs but unconsciously. The beliefs are there, but as of yet, unquestioned. And without questioning the underlying beliefs the reactions happen automatically and the patterns are repeated.


I must acknowledge my dissatisfaction.  I suffer because of what I think I am. Suffering happens because of the thoughts which go unquestioned. Then there is fear that questioning these thoughts would be bad and that holds the suffering in place. Why do I fear questioning my beliefs when the Truth withstands all scrutiny?


Feeling can undermine thoughts. It is prior to. What do I really want?  And why? For what purpose?


Am I some human being with human wants and desires? Human aches and pains?  What does it mean to be human assuming I am that?  Is there part of me which does not die/is eternal?


What is experience? What is seeing and aware of all that is (for to not be aware of it, it doesn't exist to me). I cannot simply assume ANYTHING. I do not truly know anything. Everything appears as seeming reality. It cannot be denied but THE WAY IN WHICH IT IS KNOWN CAN BE QUESTIONED AND INVESTIGATED FOR THE REALITY BEHIND PERCEPTION-APPEARANCE.


A shift in perception is a shift in the seeming reality. What is prior to the seeming experience? Truth comes in multiple levels. Within each level there can be more true and less true, yet can 'truth as only true' be known in a world of 'true as true and false as false'?


Richard Rose mentioned in his epic poem Three Books of the Absolute: “Is not man a question asking questions, frustrated by the unanswered, laboring to answer himself....and creating a mountain of questions in the answer?”... and yet he had AN ANSWER.  The desire is to get close to this answer by becoming it.  Can you become what you are? And how can what I am, what you are, not be known truly to Truth as that which is.


By limitation I define myself but can self be beyond limitation and include it?  Is the universe a friendly place and can I trust that truly all is well, all is well. When trust is given proof is shown. When doubt is given proof of that doubt is shown. What gives reality to reality as I know it? Can my own perceptions of all I have ever know be wrong...kind of humbling.


I'm wrong in my perceptions. My seeing cannot be trusted.  Whatever evidence is searched for is found to be as it was sought. Belief behind perceptions colors appearances of reality.


Doubt is unsettling and pervasive. A resolution is hinted at yet unrealized. If there is no solution then there is no problem yet the perception of a problem exists so the solution must be because there is a problem. A splinter in the back of your mind that maybe, just maybe something isn't quiet right about life or about reality as Morpheus describes it in the movie the Matrix.


Investigation requires discrimination. Discrimination is simply knowing the difference between two things. It must be a clear cut knowing between what is true and what is false. This distinction occurs in all the teachings in some form or another and seems to be a preliminary but necessary step towards true Knowledge which is also described as "not knowing" but an absolute not knowing.


When listening or reading a teaching of another there is automatically an effect upon my mind as one tuning fork of a stronger power will cause another tuning fork in close proximity to come into harmony with itself. The effect may be temporary but the fact that it happens points to a natural law and challenges my ordinary perception of all I take to be true.


Prayer is what is under admitting one's ignorance. I do not know the truth but my desire is to know the truth and I am open to whatever it is or isn't. Please allow me to see past my preconceptions and truly know.


I also allow my own lack of knowledge to be substituted by the seeming wiser knowing of others. I may automatically distrust others by default yet in truth they may have my best interests at heart and I may have their best interest at heart. I'm willing to test out opposing beliefs to my standard comfortable ideas. This usually requires going outside my comfort zone and usually involves doing something that I've never done before or trying out a different way that didn't previously occur to me.


It can seem hopeless at times because it is all there is.  It is hopeless but there is no other way. Do not be discouraged. Only continue. Go until there is no more going and then go further. Listen to what you feel rather than your thoughts. It is a lighter feeling which is more true than the heaviness.


Find some way to get a reading on a situation. Check in always with your feelings and note which feelings go with which thoughts. Note the patterns and see if there are feelings which do not match the thoughts. These are the ones to really listen to...such as the feelings from your dreams. Day dreams count too! (As do night dreams). Do not doubt your perceptions or dismiss them. Investigate them, question them but do not deny them your attention.


Take everything with deadly seriousness even the lightness of humor. Not everything is so serious or need be so dire. It may be important to set worry aside for a time and see how things go without your involvement.  Can you laugh at your mistakes? Is that past journal writing about yesteryear’s problem so terrible now?  Letting go of old event can happen naturally though forgetting.


That forgetting happens also means we need a system of remembering if we are to counter nature to accomplish the unusual. It is unusual to see those who have awakened and their stories often involve much effort and reaching for their goals.


Remembering may be accomplished through association automatically. You plan to leave out a spiritual book until the fact that you haven't read it gnaws at you and you decide to pick it up and read it. Or perhaps it may come as an inspiration and motivation just sitting on a desk until that feeling seems to grow within you that the book is calling to you and that reading it turns out to be a good idea.  It need not be a book but it is good to have a physical object to remind you of what you want to remember.


You will trick yourself and that reminder alarm that was set up every hour on the hour to remind you to be mindful will be inconvenient later as you become distracted again. Yet it is still important to set up such reminders to see how your mind works.


What pulls you away from spiritual action and what brings you back? Can the pull from within be described?


Try emptying your schedule and your worries. Set aside certain tasks and remember that while you are not infinite, infinity is.  Time will go on beyond the petty concerns I have for the world as does everyone else have and does. Slow down with deliberate purpose to get at what is really bothering you. The clearer you can describe it to yourself the closer you can get to resolving it. Spend some time with your dissatisfaction not because you want to get rid of it but allow it to be there and look at it from another angle.


You can get another angle or shift in perspective by taking on a view point of another. They see things differently than me. I’ll consider that I may not be right and allow that they may not be wrong.  What does my problem or gnawing feeling look like then?


Being of service to others can also shift your perspective away from your self concern. A whole new world awaits one who does for others selflessly even if it is at a cost. In fact, the greater the cost the higher the rewards. If seeking such rewards of selfless service to others then no rewards will be found. You can't do for others because you want to do for yourself.  But even with a mixed motive, you might occasionally forget your self concern and truly be selfless for a time... and what a time that will be! Newness and brightness and wonder can be seen beyond the darkness of the status quo.


These times are openings and when progress appears to be made. It is as if one is traveling in a forest for so long that the sun can't be seen. Then climbing a tree and looking back and looking ahead part of the path you were on appears so clear as does part of the path you have yet to traverse. An ultimate perspective isn't there, yet hope and inspiration come to ask one quietly and gently to go on...continue.


Know your machinery. If you’re not sensitive and eat meat, try a respite from it. Those fruit and vegetables will seem much more subtle and tastier and so might other qualities be seen. Caffeine after a break from it might induce heavy thinking for a while. Fasting can bring all sorts of insights. Going for a walk can bring back forgotten ideas from the day or even memories of last night’s dream.


Don't understand poetry? Poetry requires a finer understanding than the intellect can produce. Try to find something you already appreciate such a song lyrics (which are poetry set to music) and work backward. Ask all the questions the intellect wants such as "why did the performer use these set of words?" “What does this part of the song mean?” And so forth. The more you appreciate it the better. What you value you will keep. It may lead to a better understanding and appreciation on the path. You may feel gratitude replacing indignance or resentment. Allow gratitude to fill you up.


Guidance is available within. Within is other than without.  The lessening of the external is helpful for a time to find a help that which only you can give to yourself. This will require external listening to guidance and teachings from others, from books and recordings or videos or from observation of the world around you. Guidance carries a humble certainty which doesn't boast and doesn't even care even if it is wrong or can be doubted. It's all alright.


Doing an 'opposite thing' can change who you think you are. Don't be stuck on any idea of who or what you are until you really know. There may be times when there is relative clarity but they often are temporary. What is, Is, always was and always will be. Anything that is temporary is false and not true in an absolute sense.


Working with others can accelerate all parties involved by an exponential factor. Unseen help is given for every honest effort. Effort without an expectation of the result is truer than doing for something. Do for the sake of doing not for what doing might bring.


Awareness of death, mortality, illness, temporariness and one’s own role in these may help motivate action and decision where there is inaction and indecision. We don't have long before life passes by but are able to do something about it while we can. Work with what you got, lemons or whatever.